How to Develop Passionate Pain Facing Difficult Times?

  • Reading time:8 mins read

Take a couple of minutes to think about what you’re passionate about. Is it your career, being an entrepreneur, staying fit, sending your children to college, paying a new home, and the list of passions go on. 

Whatever it is. It’s that one thing that wakes you up through the middle of the night. You’ve sacrificed so much for that one thing. And, even if you haven’t achieved it yet. Nothing can stop you. You have an inner drive that just won’t let you quit. 

Therefore, you can’t quit. You won’t quit. The passion within won’t allow you to. It like a force, an energy between you and it. You just can’t let it go because you know it’s going to come to pass. Deep within. You already have it. It just hasn’t manifested itself yet. 

It’s called passionate pain. 

I can remember growing up in a house with four other siblings and a mother who stayed at home to rear us. So, all five of us asking our parents for specific things when going to the store was almost impossible. 

We heard–“Put that back! We can’t afford that right now. Or, if we buy that, everyone will have to share.” I watched my dad work hard to make ends meet. He worked a split shift, which allowed him to spend a few hours at home before returning to work. 

During this time at home, he helped my mother prepare our meals and made sure we stayed on top of our homework. 

Boy, what a team. But, I found myself over years dealing with the words “put that back.” I was filled with pain and anger because I knew my parents had sacrificed so much for us. At that moment, I vowed to never let my children lack. 

After getting married, having children, and being a homemaker, I found myself repeating my parents’ cycle. “Put that back, we can’t afford that. Or, if you get that you both have to share.” Mine you, we only have two children compared to their five. 

Passionate Pain: A Call To Action

One night before bed, I cried out to God and the tears wouldn’t stop flowing. Something happened within me that changed my life. Passionate Pain.

“It’s strange how a word, a phrase, a sentence, can feel like a blow to the head.” ― Veronica Roth, Allegiant

The following morning. I got up and called the nearest universities to find another way to make life simple because I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but worth the pain. 

I can proudly say. It took me 14 years to earn my doctorate in education. The passionate pain was worth getting to the finish line. 

“The pain you feel today will be the strength you feel tomorrow”. 

Passion fosters progress. If you truly enjoy what you’re doing, you’re going to continue to work harder to make it happen. If you don’t like it, you’re wasting your time. You won’t succeed–which, in turn, discourages you even more.

Life is better than your past and what you see. Allow passion to move you to persevere at something despite your fears, unhappiness, and pain. Be determined and let it motivate you to push through suffering for the sake of an end goal. 

The bottom line in finding motivation is never to betray yourself and what you love. So instead of reciting empty affirmations, and promising yourself, you’ll start tomorrow–and it never comes. Ask yourself this question: ‘Will I take what I just read and implement it in my life?’

4 Ways to Use Passionate Pain When You Feel Like Nothing Is Work:

Don’t Be A Victim:

 Use the energy to create new pathways for success to reach your life goals. Let go of the “victim label.” Free yourself from resentment, bitterness, and mishaps of the past so you can foster positive and creative thoughts.  

Create short and long-term goals: 

Instead of focusing on the tough time you are going facing, turn your attention to your goals. Post them somewhere so you can see them daily. If you keep those goals in mind, you’ll find yourself thinking more about how you’re going to get those goals accomplished.

Accept support and love: 

Don’t shut the people out that’s really in your corner. This was difficult for me because of my pride. You’re used to being self-reliant and self-sufficient times of crisis. But, be willing to admit that you’re in pain and the ones that are coming around may have the wisdom, guidance, strength, and insight you need. 

Find the positive in every situation. Learn a lesson: 

This situation is making you stronger. Of course, you don’t see it now. But, you’ll have an amazing story to tell family, friends, and colleagues. 

Above all, you’ll be able to help someone else through their passionate pain. 

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